Setting Yourself Up For Success
I thought that the first expert’s comment about setting oneself up for success by ensuring that you are working in an environment where you are not distracted by these sorts of personal matters was particularly poignant. I think that irregardless of how the company culture led to these events or are exacerbating them, there is something to be said of needing to recognize when an environment is not allowing you to reach your full potential. For this reason, I think I agree on some level that she could explore other employment options and I think that it is reasonable that she would be able to advocate for herself and get a similar compensation package elsewhere. I also think that the risk of losing some amount of compensation can always be a limiting by making people stay in jobs for too long. Exploring alternative options and seeing if it can be matched is not inherently risky; in fact, you could argue that at least exploring other options is one way to ensure that you are constantly pushing yourself to grow. Beyond this, there were certainly a few red flags in terms of company culture. For example, I think it was odd that the CEO was commenting on Claudia and Brad’s relationship during an all hands meeting and that Brad had seemingly no consequences for repeatedly pursuing subordinates. I think the larger gender dynamic here would signal that it is likely beneficial to seek another opportunity. While she should not sacrifice her professional progress for this issue, if she can find a comparable job somewhere else she should take it.
How to Frame Conversations about Personal Matters
This is perhaps a controversial opinion, but, as a manager who found out about the issue, I think that I would only comment on the situation if her work had been negatively impacted in some tangible way. Given that she is a star employee, unless there was some true change in her performance as a result of this personal issue, I think that it is inappropriate to comment on its existence. The conversation about whether Claudia should travel should have ended when the manager explained why they thought it was beneficial to the company to teach Claudia these skills. Making a personal dig about how she needed to get over it is deeply inappropriate. Also, even if I noticed a change in performance, I would likely start by asking questions along the lines of, “I’ve noticed this change in your performance and I want to discuss it. Is there anything causing this or can I do anything to support you…” I think that this strategy is better than assuming the cause, as it allows the employee to share information in a more professional way and also centers the conversation around work performance rather than office gossip.
