Ask yourself:
- Do I agree with the expert?
- If I was a manager, and found out about the situation, what would I do about this?
I agree with Wendi Lazar’s perspective that Elizabeth should remain at the company for the time being, at least until her stock options vest. I completely empathize with Elizabeth’s pain. The breakup itself is difficult, but what makes it worse is the toxic double standard and disdain she faces from her colleagues. It’s clear that her workplace is exacerbating her emotional turmoil, and while Brad seems to move on effortlessly, Elizabeth is left to deal with the brunt of office gossip and teasing.
However, I also believe it’s important to recognize that the core of Elizabeth’s discomfort isn’t solely because this is an office romance. Elizabeth is still emotionally and mentally wounded from her breakup, and it seems she hasn’t had the time or space to fully process it. The fact that she must witness Brad and Claudia’s relationship on a daily basis only compounds her pain, but it’s not the office setting itself that’s causing her distress—it’s the unresolved emotions from her breakup. Had this relationship unfolded outside the office, Elizabeth might be feeling the same intense pain and frustration. The constant reminders of her ex moving on would still be difficult, regardless of whether she encountered him in a professional or personal context.
Because of this, I think Elizabeth needs to prioritize her emotional recovery before making any major career decisions. She should seek out a therapist or psychiatrist to help her navigate her feelings and process the breakup. Surrounding herself with friends and a support network is also crucial in helping her rebuild her sense of well-being. Once she’s had the chance to emotionally recover, she’ll be in a much clearer state of mind to decide whether to stay at her current job or explore new opportunities.
While financial considerations are important—such as her stock options—her mental health and enthusiasm for her work should take precedence. Staying in a job she loves only to feel constantly undermined by emotional pain will affect her productivity and satisfaction in the long run. Her future decisions should be driven by what environment will allow her to thrive, both professionally and personally.
If, in the meantime, Elizabeth witnesses or has evidence that Brad, Claudia, or others are intentionally disparaging her or undermining her position at the company, she should take her concerns to HR or the CEO. It’s in the company’s best interest to handle such matters, as unresolved interpersonal drama can impact overall productivity and lead to reputational damage. If the company fails to address her concerns, or if a legal battle is too emotionally taxing, then leaving for a fresh start at another company may indeed be the best option for Elizabeth.
Ultimately, Elizabeth needs to give herself the space to heal, seek support, and then decide what’s best for her both financially and emotionally.
—
If I were Elizabeth’s manager and became aware of the situation, I would approach her privately with empathy, ensuring she feels supported and respected in the workplace. I would listen to her concerns and address any inappropriate behavior, such as public displays of affection or gossip, by reminding everyone of the company’s professionalism standards. If needed, I would involve HR to reinforce policies that maintain a healthy work environment. Additionally, I would offer Elizabeth resources like counseling or flexible work arrangements to help her manage her emotions and performance, emphasizing her value to the company while supporting her decision if she ultimately chose to move on.
