The most obvious bad habit I decided to track for this assignment was my nicotine habit. I unfortunately have been addicted to smoking for several years now and have “quit” probably 30+ times, with various degrees of success (of course, never complete success or I wouldn’t be writing this now). This seemed to me to be the obvious thing to focus my Measuring Me Take 2 experiment on, as it is truly a nefarious habit that I would like to kick.
It is also quite a measurable habit as I don’t have to set any timers or be incredibly mindful about how often I smoke: my nicotine intake encompasses discrete moments in time that are therefore easy to reflect on. For the purposes of this assignment, I decided to track my usage over the course of 4 days (Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday) in order to have more data points in which to base my analysis.
Overall, I found the experience to be inducive to quitting. By holding myself accountable to exactly how many cigarettes I intake a day, I have fewer excuses to write off my habits or ignore the patterns. One obvious and irrefutable observation I had was that the pull of dependence was simply too difficult to overcome with mental determination alone. In other words, the addictive nature of nicotine made it so that, even while more cognizant of my usage, I could not simply reduce or stop all together. The pull (or the “itch” as it’s denoted in my models) is just too strong. Therefore, medical interventions are likely necessary (i.e. patches, pills). I also noticed that the routine is just that: a routine. My nicotine usage follows a schedule that I stick to pretty strictly, even if not intending too. For example, my first cigarette of the day is usually around 1 or 2 pm, followed by one more around sunset, and another at night (at least). I often tell myself I want to go on a walk to clear my head, but inevitably this entails smoking a cigarette. Therefore, when I am stressed or overwhelmed (emotionally) as I was this weekend with fires raging in my hometown, the urge becomes even stronger. The act of tracking, though, is a deterrent in that it sort of leverages the stigma of smoking. I have to confront my own habits and behaviors when I intentionally write them in my notes app.
If I were to repeat this exercise, I might choose something more ordinary and routine, like checking my phone/doom scrolling the news. I purposely didn’t do that because I thought that this weekend posed a significant departure in my usual habits as I was more heavily doomscrolling due to current events. This would make it less representative of how I spend my time and more burdensome to track. I think if I were to track the same habit again, I might jot down some notes about the emotions and thoughts I had leading up to a “cigarette break” to gain insight into how these same emotions and thoughts could perhaps be alleviated through a different activity.
